youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
