i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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