If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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