sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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