I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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