I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
sarcasm needs its own font
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
