dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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