Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
