with your own penis?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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