he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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