**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
