And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
These 17 People Made Horrible Decisions That Ruined Their Lives
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms