I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
