You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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