David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize