moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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