my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
