I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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