butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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