fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
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