with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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