I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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