so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Barsexuality is the new black.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
