The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
