is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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