Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
sarcasm needs its own font
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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