I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
