Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
