I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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