i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
