I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
