Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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