I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Randomize
