Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
