i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
