Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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