We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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