Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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