Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Randomize
