Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This beer is not sobering me up at all
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize