actually, I'm a sock model
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me