Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
do herpes really smell.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
