he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
