I'm lost and stupid without you.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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