:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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