have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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