He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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