mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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