i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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