I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
